Today wednesday 5th Oct 2011 was no different to yesterday or the day before that same illness same feelings when as i sit on the edge of my bed each morning i feel like giving myself a good talking to come on mick get your act together you are still here you have that loving family always giving you support and it could be worse i then think but yes will it get worse time oh well for the bathroom and get ready for another day.
First trip Doctors appointment 08.30 Blood pressure check, Pulse check AF still present, Chest x ray still showing heart dilated, Hospital procedure for Colonoscopy still on at the Hospital for the 6th December well nothing new there then so of home i go.
What to do today well it's bonus day i have company my wife sheila is on her day of or should i say days as she is of tommorow as well. Morrisons is the destination i cant wait as i get to push the trolly lol. When we are in morrisons it is not long before i start to get the achy chest and start to feel as though i want to go home but i think no dont want to spoil the day for my wife even if we are only in morrisons.
2 painkillers and 1 diazapam later feel more relaxed so we go on to Homebase had a little browse saw a few people who i knew who commented on how well i look not wanting to discuss how i feel i just comment thanks yes i dont feel to bad ( If only they really new it's not how i look it's how i feel on the inside ) and carry on browsing.
Why do i feel so guilty when people ask where are you working now mick to which i reply no not working now due to this illness. I feel as though they think to themselves well he looks ok to me but as always everyone replies oh i see well hope you get better soon. ( if only i think to myself. )
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